The earth has really been speaking to me lately. I look at her and I think, we have the most beautiful mother. Because I spend so much time in space (ha), it has been very stabilizing for me try and connect with Big Mama whenever and however I can. This was definitely on my mind this morning when I was feeling a little stretched from my lack of sleep. I get up, I go to the garden, I let my eyes be blessed by the perfection of nature, I ask to be a blessing for those who I cross paths with. This grounds me. I had been experimenting with grounding cords for about a month last December, where you imagine a cord running from the place behind your navel to the center of the earth, but I found myself traveling farther and farther out and finding it more difficult to want to journey back in. The in and out of that last sentence are interchangeable.
Lately I have been experiencing a fervent desire to be close to Gaia, and to anything and anyone that feels natural or pure. The closeness feels like the love that I remember missing so badly when I was a child. Knowing that there had to be something else out there that was complete and intuiting that this love on earth, as we have known it, just didn't add up to what was in my heart. Kind of makes it tough to take another breath in a half life, but everyone has issues surfacing for them right now and this one is mine. This desire is manifesting in several ways, the foods I eat have changed significantly. There are some people who have seemed to evaporate from my life and others that seemed to apparate into it kind of out of nowhere but who I am inextricably connected to. Music's changed, mind has changed, heart has changed. All I want is more of what feels like love to me, more earth, gratitude and honesty. And consequently that is what I share with others, with the world, with you all- it flows through me and belongs to everyone. I am rambling, the point is that something has definitely shifted in my relationship to the earth. I hear her.
I heard her for the first time as a spirit, I was giving Reiki to my friend's feet when I encountered a strong and yet delicate presence within me. I asked her who she was and she responded that she was the earth. I can't really speak on the rest of the message since that is a private message intended for my gorgeous friend who was receiving Reiki, but it was quite something to have that magic inside me.
Today I heard the earth for the second time. This morning I read a blogpost on the 2012 Scenario by Suzanne Lie. I didn't have my wits about me to connect with it at the time until it connected to me later in the day. Here is the link to that post: http://the2012scenario.com/2012/09/suzanne-lie-a-message-from-gaia/. The part that stuck with me, and that I have been working with is accepting the gifts that the earth has given me simply by agreeing to let me be here at this time, one phrase in particular "How can a planet transmute my form?" was potent to my subconscious mind. It wasn't until later in the day, when my awesome boss randomly asked me to watch a video with her, that I received an answer. Here is the video: http://vimeo.com/48128037. At 2 minutes and 15 seconds I heard her again, and this time she said, "This is how I love you, nothing is accidental.". And there was my heart, broken apart and made all at once. Thank you, Mama.
It took me until now to decide this, when I grow up I want to be a Tree and when I die I want to be a Star.
Sat Nam,
Nicole
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