Black, White & Grey

I began writing this post exactly a month ago. I took longer with it because I was navigating how to share the information. Like many of you, I work with spirit guides. There is some dissonance amongst channelers about what exactly those guides are. Some people say that they are angels, some say that they are deities or devas or ascended masters. Some will claim to work with the elemental energies, the faeries and dragons, mermaids, dolphins and whales. Others will outright tell you that they do work with ETs.

I would consider myself as someone who has connected with most of the beings named and then some. Some people think that every interaction we have is an interaction with ETs and that they project images into our head or consciousness of beings that we would commonly know as angels or Gods to make it easier for us to interact with them without our consciousness shattering.  This has certainly occurred to me, and most recently felt quite certain.

When I first began to write this post, I was a bit confounded by a fresh experience that I had. My friend was supposed to spend the night and I went to visit her at her job before going home. She mentioned that she would rather go home that night and it was no bother since I was feeling wiped out from a long week and completely under the weather.

That night as I was falling asleep I noticed that there was a grey alien in my bedroom. Now, when I say that there was a grey alien in my bedroom I am not being completely literal in a 3d way. I mean that I could sense and feel and see (with my mind's eye) the presence of this being. I have written before about the greys and their bad wrap. I have also shared about how one in particular has helped me for quite some time- for which I am thankful. I have also had the peculiar sense that there is some sort of ship above my apartment building in Brooklyn. I simply have seen so many strange thingies in the sky by my house to call them UFOs.  Anyhow, this grey kept approaching me and attempting to do work on me. I grumpily rejected it, telling it with my mind to go away. The strange thing is that it was persistent. It would not let up no matter how many times I said no- that I didn't want to be touched or handled that night, however I had the distinct feeling that this grey was trying to help me and that I had let it approach me and agreed to do this work. It just so happened that I was extremely sleepy and unwell and that combination usually turns me into a big grump. After several minutes of this back and forth I yelled at the grey and told it NOOOO. I got so flustered that in my mind I stated, "You know what, I am going to wake up right now and turn on the light and the minute I turn on the light you will not even be here." So I did.

I hastily threw the blankets off of me, moved my dog out of the way and turned the light on. I was in my room, alone- as I had expected. Being flustered from this strange interaction, I decided that it wouldn't suit me to simply go back to sleep, that I would rather get up and shake it off. I decided to do this by going to the bathroom though I didn't need to go. As I was crossing the hallway to the bathroom door, I heard someone's keys in the lock of the front door.  My dog quickly sprang up and started barking and I walked toward the front door flipping the lights on as I went. The door cracked open and I could see my friend on the other side. Seeing her was a relief and surprise since she'd told me only hours before that she was going to go home rather than stay at mine. We spoke for a moment and I followed her to the bathroom where I turned that light on for her and told her about what had happened to me. She gave me a hug and told me not to worry. Then the oddest thing happened... I went directly from her hug to my bed- supine in darkness. I awoke very confused by this, I was just hugging her, I thought.  I turned on a light and looked at the clock- 2:48, there's no way that she would be out of work this early. I got up and went to the living room but she wasn't there. It dawned on me that I had, A- been abducted, which makes no sense by the way, because I willingly go up to the ships at night and do work and learning, or B) this grey projected a scenario into my mind that would make my consciousness comfortable enough for the work I had pre-agreed to let him do to be carried out, or C) that my friend's higher self actually teleported to protect me and make me feel safe, or D) a combination of the above.

When I spoke to my friend the following morning she said that she'd finished work early the night before and a while before 3 am she had a very protective feeling over me. So as these things go, who knows exactly what transpired. I do know that the greys work with both of us, one in particular works as one of our shared guides, and others try to take her places in her dream time.

So let me pre apologize because this is going to be a long post, but I think it's important because I sense that many of us are being worked on by the greys right now.

Another time with another friend about a half dozen showed up while I was giving her a Reiki treatment. We both saw them and felt them. However this experience stands out because they actually entered our bodies. We were both a bit disturbed by this because while it wasn't violent or creepy it did feel like an intrusion. (This is when that post about contracts and pre-agreements comes in handy.) I spoke to a very lovely woman about this particular experience and she was able to figure out what happened quite easily. She explained that we kept nearing the energetic frequency that was necessary to perform the highest healing possible, but neither of us could hold it for long enough. Basically they entered our bodies to kind of up our frequency long enough for this to happen. Cool right?

So the reason I put this post off is because I still felt conflicted by all of this interaction with the greys. There is a spiritual war going on and most human beings are kind of like babies when it comes to using our full dimensional powers/tools to interact with higher dimensional beings.  It is important to be careful, judicious, and vigilant about who and what you let into your sphere. Not to say that you can't learn from having negative interactions, but the last thing I want is for destructive or mischief beings to be hanging around me- or any of you really. Your choice. Anyhow, I was sort of digesting it all. Digesting my own fear as well. Why do I have such an intense visceral blockage to these particular aliens?  I suppose we have been programmed to fear them... and no one is immune to programming. But seriously- it seemed strange to me that I just blocked myself from speaking on this.

And then yesterday happened. During my daily meditation I found myself in complete stillness until I began to notice many being convening and communing in this meditation with me. I saw the grey's face very nearby, sort of looking at me, sort of not. And when I caught his gaze I recognized this sadness around my heartspace. In the middle of my meditation I began crying, not tiny baby tears, but full on giant weeping, sobbing tears. I realized just how little I know about everything that is happening and how my fear made me act callously toward this particular being that has shown unconditional love toward me. I realized that everything we think we know is an illusion, an innocent way of trying to classify the divine in our limited human way, and acting in a childlike human way. I reached out toward the grey with my light body and circled him in my arms, he was "surprisingly" receptive. From the center of my heart that pain and fear that barred me from connecting to him fully dissipated into gratitude and love and appreciation, I couldn't believe that I had never consciously embraced this gentle being before now. As did this, I saw giant wings encircle my body and was literally surrounded by the many different beings that I interact with- even those I interact with only on occasion, my angels were so happy and supportive of this moment.  From my heartspace I also sent out waves of love and gratitude to all of them and I sent it toward myself as well, and my higher self and my physical body, for carrying me through this mission, for having patience with me despite the amount of "time" it has taken me to tap in and remember. Even now as I write, I am overcome by gratitude and humbled by the show of so much trust and faith and protection that tears are welling up in my eyes.  They are tears of love.

I have no idea what will happen in the next days, weeks or months. Life, as it becomes more magical, also has a way of shaking lose any expectations or plans that I had before this remembering. Sort of floating in between many things over here, grateful as anything to be alive, to enjoy the sweetness of breath and the ecstasy of my loved ones' laughter.  The more I know, the more I don't know, more and more I see that life is not in black and white, but grey. Grey is everywhere and everything, the harmony of black and white. The place where we shine our light.

in & out

Hi Everyone!

I hope you are all doing super well. So I am writing because some interesting things are happening much more commonly these days.  First off, there is this wonderful acknowledgment to anchor the energies that we have all worked so hard to build and remember by grounding ourselves.  A few weeks ago after a week laden with energy work toward myself and others my friend and I decided to do an Arcturian DNA activation for 12.12.12. In conjunction with all of the work that I had been conducting and receiving I felt that I had enough. I was spending so much time deep within myself and out of myself in meditation in the energy earth and I began to feel completely exhausted. This is to be expected since we were and ARE definitely seeing some shifts through the last months of the year, but it didn't feel honest. So I found myself doing more "earth bound" activities, more of the "mundane" as so many folks have advised me to do.

I have always found drinking to be incredibly grounding. But there is a danger to enjoying too many spirits... they have their own agenda and if you let them, they will gladly take over the space you hold for them and run amok.  Just like I wouldn't invite communication with every being, it's important to create those positive boundaries in 3d as well.  So, I don't want to get caught in the trap of drinking to ground my energy.  What to do? I ate sugar, that was cool until I realized that it was making my blood hot. I danced, well- I dance, but that certainly doesn't calm me down. I reground after meditation but I then find that I am generally uninterested in most things and it is difficult to have conversations with most people. I don't want that...

I started taking moldavite baths to make outer conversations more stimulating. But then people couldn't really understand what I was laughing about when they were talking to me about life things. I didn't understand either, I just know that I was enjoying myself significantly more. Follow your bliss, right?

Now I am settling and beginning to accept being in & out of this energetic space and not expecting myself to be one thing or another. Not expect myself to stay or leave, to want or reject... to be accepting of the fact that I am in between- sometimes being more there and sometimes being more here, and knowing that both are an expression of the same exact beingness. The idea is ultimately moving without judgement for myself or others. Sound familiar?

Speaking of in & out, another phenomenon that I have become aware of is A LOT of folks getting sick and being in and out of being sick.  Upgrades. Also, there is a high incidence of injury, Upgrades. And there is a lot of violence irrupting right now. RESISTANCE.

Breathe into the aspects of yourself and others that are resisting. It sounds silly- how do you breathe into others... but it's not. Imagine that your breath can create a more loving space in the part of them that is compressed and restricted. Ultimately it will be their freewill choice to receive this intention or not, but it is likely that you will be able to interact with resisting aspects of yourselves more compassionately after having set the empathic and nurturing attention around it.

Anyhow, a rambling post about many things- but I hope any of this helps.

Love you,
Nicole

Ascension

ascension |əˈsenSHən|noun [ in sing. ]the act of rising to an important position or a higher level: his ascension to the ranks of pop star.• ( Ascension )the ascent of Christ into heaven on the fortieth day after the Resurrection.
For about 2 and half weeks before the 21st I was plagued by knowledge.  This appears to be an odd statement because we often find that the more we know and discover, the better equipped we are to make decisions that are more equitable for ourselves and each other. 
What I am referring to in particular is the resurfacing of an issue that I thought I had released some time ago- feeling weighted down by knowing. Feeling proud of my knowing in a deceptive way, a way that subtlety leads me to believe that I carry the burden of a knowledge that leads me to a freedom that feels more like enslavement to my own mind. 
I am not interested in this slavery. We have learned so much in 3d and it is time to be fully compassionate toward ourselves. First off, to recognize that we cannot solely live in our heart or our minds, but in order to anchor the lesson of polarity we must accept that both the heart- the feeling and intuitive organ and the mind- the thinking and reasoning organ are equally as important as the other. In fact, it is the harmonizing of these two vital organ that allows us to progress and ascend. 
The night before I left New York City I went on three shamanic journeys with my girlfriends- fellow star seeds who I am incredibly fortunate to have in my life. The journey I led was a journey to reconnect with what our business was in Atlantis. While one of my friends was able to journey and recollect very clearly to what her life and job was like, the other found herself unable to fully go through the journey- instead being taught the nature of energetic exchange between two human beings and how energy moves in between two people. The movement of that energy is the shape of infinity. And it is clear to see imbalanced exchanges between two people when you practice paying attention to where the center of that infinity symbol lies in the space between your bodies.  
Our own bodies emit an energetic field similar in shape to that of the earth- a horus.  What is interesting about our chakras is that they each emit the same energetic field, creating an almost fountain-like appearance from each one- a field that defies all logic and gravity.  The REALLY cool part that became evident to me recently at "night school" is the part where between each chakra in our own body, there is a symbol of infinity flowing and present to harmonize the flow of energy between the chakras- so we are no longer dealing with a straight up and down flow of energy like in the old paradigm, we now have this beautiful OMEGA symbol that moves forward and backward in the space and time of our body, through the past, present and future that holds the life force in our energetic body and moves as we direct it to do so.  
This OMEGA symbol has become increasingly significant to me within the last few weeks because I have noticed it mostly in the passage from my brain to my hearth, converging as my throat and high heart depending on where my energy is.  In this meeting place I have discovered a space that I either didn't notice before, or that has only now revealed itself to me.  This is a space of deep trust in the environment I am creating around me. There is no scarcity here, and in fact there is much stillness. 
About two or three months ago I began knowing that I had already ascended.  I realized that our projection and expectation of what would happen on the 21st was another foray into the age of polarity, another opportunity to truly address our own mind and acknowledge whether or not it was in synch with our own heart. People really worked themselves up about what might happen- especially in the light worker community.  The experience of the 21st was so "disappointing" in a very 3rd dimensional way for many folks... but that is just it.
If we want to move past the age of polarity, we must embrace our 3rd dimensional expectations as parts of our former selves that urgently need healing and releasing. Treat it as you would a child, with great compassion... we are children in our galactic evolution. 
Lately I have received a great deal of information regarding about how I appear to people in their dreams, or as they're walking down the street or in their thoughts. And on the other end of that, I have heard "light workers" say things like, "I can't wait to teleport"... 
If you are fully expecting to teleport somewhere with your entire physicality than I suggest you connect with your guides and angels and ask them to help you let go...
The point of the higher dimensions, is that we do not need these meat suits to be present. In fact, most of you have recognized or thought or accepted that these meat suits are a projection of the density of the 3rd dimension. So... following that train of logic perhaps we could become less dogmatic about the way we think about teleportation, telepathy, remote viewing, etc. Chances are that is will not "LOOK" the way that we expected it to look because that expectation it fully rooted in 3rd dimensional logic and density... everything from here on up becomes and is much more subtle.  This means that we should truly pay attention to our need for "evidence".  The evidence of ascension is all around us and mostly importantly, it is within us.  
Many people have written about how painful their disappointment has been. This is an opportunity for you to recognize that disappointment as your own resistance to what it happening around you, to release your expectations and welcome the abundance of higher energies and consciousness despite that they may not have been what you envisioned.  
The very cool part, I sense, is the fact that things don't appear to be terribly different from what they were before. For me this means that we were already inherently divine beings worthy of and possessing the gifts we need to live the life we want to live- to experience the world we want to experience.  How cool is that?!
Please keep in mind that many of you (us) are currently in 4-D, this means that whatever your thoughts and wherever your energy- they will manifest much more quickly. Stay centered in yourself and in the vision of the world you wish to create, it will happen and the reality of your conscious desires may actually surprise you. 
We need shadow and light, we need knowledge and ignorance, we need fear and hope... these are the tools that will help us to truly build the perfect situation for ourselves. They will show us what we can leave behind and what we want more of.
Know that you are perfect, know that you are exactly what and where you need to be or otherwise you simply wouldn't. Recognize the illusion of "rising to a higher position" than the one you are currently in, one that was perfected by you and the great creator.
Travel in innocence and protection always.
My love,Nicole

We need more love

Our bodies were meant to hold an incredible amount of light. It is only incredible because few of us remember use how divine we actually are.

There is love encircling every last particle on this planet. Every last particle within us, it is what we born from and how we create. Some of us are resisting this love. It shows up as tension, as illness, as lack of synchronicity (ie. an "off"day).

We must look at ourselves. We must look at each other. We must look at a world- not an earth, because SHE DID NOT ASK FOR THIS, where there is so much death, where there is injustice and pain, where people are starving despite that we live in a world abundant enough to feed us all, where trees are cut down despite that they literally filter the air that we breathe- as a service to us.  We must examine a climate where most people are a paycheck or tragedy away from being without a home, or one where our food is literally being poisoned by the people we trust to protect our freedom.

We need more love. We cannot wait for this love to happen, we surrender to this love. We are creators. We can create an environment around ourselves and within every single interaction be it personal, professional, financial, sexual, consumption that is based in love... this is how your world changes- the vibratory effects subtly radiating outward toward and subtly changing the world.

Wake up to the love that you are. Every moment is another opportunity for peace. Come to it.

In love,
Nicole